First of all, the disclaimer. Do nothing until you have coffee. Do nothing until you have coffee. This is my new rule for life. Big mistakes happen without coffee. They do for me anyways. We were meeting up with friends, for the NFR in Vegas. A trip we had planned to celebrate our 25th. We are sometimes last minute kind of people, …..We are last minute kind of people. In our rushing around there was no time for a manly haircut. He grabbed his clippers and threw them into the bag, as we headed out the door.
The next morning I felt groggy from the previous days travels, “Honey, could you clip the back of my hair?” Standing in the bathroom, handing clippers to me, he turned around. Quickly I ran the clippers up the back of his head. Suddenly I jolted, when I realized the #2 blade was not attached. A bald stripe right up the back, dead center , like the water parted kind of departure. His hands quickly cupped his head as to hold unto any stragglers. “I just wanted you to shave the hair on my neck.”
“Oh I’m soooo sorry!” is all I could say, “I haven’t had my coffee..?…” Silence filled the hotel bathroom as I tried my best saleswomen, “ party in the front” approach to his new stylin’ do! He wasn’t buying it. I didn’t laugh. I waited. I explained how I could fix it and after a brief cry, he wiped his tears and I proceeded as bathroom barber.
We drove in silence for an hour towards Flagstaff , facing straight ahead, I was careful not to stare his direction. But then I couldn’t hold it in any longer. I tried to looking out the window but my convulsing laughter now filled the cab of our truck. Turning towards him, he pushed his hat further down on his head and laughed right along with me.
I know, I thought this post was about laughing with him and not at him. It is, give me a minute to explain.
Real joy doesn’t come from me or him. It’s not made up of some comedic act or blog post. Laugh and you will have a good marriage. No, laughing can be hurtful even debilitating if it’s done in the wrong matter towards someone. It can be a sign of disrespect. I commend my husband for laughing with me that day. I could have said, “Oh come on, get over it! It’s just hair!” But what if the shoe had been on the other foot. What if it was my hair I had entrusted him with and the same mistake was made? Maybe I wouldn’t have gotten over it so easy.
Laughter is good for marriage, but it’s who created that laughter and marriage that is the key. And here’s the reason why:
1. Proverbs 17:22
“A joyful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones.”
Laugh at his business idea, his advice, his job, his spiritual leadership, and you might see a man with a crushed spirit. A joy “filled” heart from God gives us that joy. That’s the medicine needed when someone makes a mistake, gets a bad report, losses the keys for the millionth time, misunderstands the instructions.
2. Proverbs 15:13
“A glad heart makes a cheerful face, but by sorrow of heart the spirit is crushed”
What does your face say about you? Does it say, “Welcome home, glad to see you” or does it say, “I don’t have time, leave me alone.”
3. Proverbs 31:25
“Strength and dignity are her clothing, and she laughs at the time to come.”
A women of strength and dignity doesn’t throw her husband under the bus, just to get a laugh from friends. She protects the dignity of her marriage. She is for him. She is also confident in her walk with God and feels secure in His answers and outcome for her life.
I don’t know about you, but I have to be reminded in this, “everything is funny” world, I’ve got to be careful to be respectful, in my laughter. Nothing wrong with making a joke, but make sure it’s one he will find funny as well.
Hope you have a good laugh this weekend………thecowboypastorswife
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